Sexual partners can help by being sympathetic, by helping to improve his diet, and by setting time aside to exercise together (see exercise and EF). If you are both overweight (see exercise and EF) you can set goals and work toward them together. It would be very helpful for you to also read our book (see Survival of the Firmest™), so you have a full understanding of the complexity of erectile function and what can be done to help. It also gives numerous useful tips for healthy eating and weight loss.

It’s important not to push your partner into performing when he doesn’t seem to be in the mood. Failing to perform will only make the problem worse. You may prefer to have sex every day, but decreasing the frequency may actually help him to perform at first. Then as he gains more confidence and does the various things we recommend, you may be able to enjoy sex as often as you did when you were younger. If you are sensitive to when he seems ready, that will get the problem moving in the right direction, and the next time he will be more likely to respond when you’re in the mood. There may be times of the day, or even in the middle of the night, when he tends to be more arousable. Strike when the iron is hot, so to speak, and his confidence will improve. Recognize that even when he does seem to be arousable, it may take more foreplay than when he was younger and not having problems with ED (erectile dysfunction).

Don’t feel less desirable because he is having difficulty performing. Erectile function, as you will learn, is extremely complex. Don’t feel less desired if he wants to use skin magazines or videos to boost his sexual drive. It’s a useful technique for helping to improve erectile function. We recommend The Sinclair Institute’s videos, which also can be helpful to both partners by teaching you a variety of different sexual techniques. For erectile function, one can’t overestimate the importance of sexual arousal, and both partners can do a bit of discovery to see what might arouse them more. Some couples get turned on by watching videos together. You can order these videos at www.bettersex.com.

Above all, be positive and optimistic. It is very likely that if you follow all of the recommendations on this site and in our book, that you will be enjoying much better sex. Some are experiencing better sex than they have ever experienced before, and you can, too. Review the testimonials and you will see what we mean. Happiness research has shown that a satisfying sex life is number one for both men and women. Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing and except for the supplements (see supplements for erectile health), which are pretty reasonable, it’s free. Enjoy!